Five false assumptions have distorted Catholic ministry with LGBT and same-sex attracted people. To foster discipleship, we need new expectations. In ministry encounters with people old and young, devout and ambivalent, single and partnered, the best pastoral care expects gay people to be…
 
Eager. Many Catholics assume Catholicism is unappealing or harmful to gay people. In reality, gay seekers bring a kaleidoscope of attitudes to the Church: ambivalence, anger, openness, scrupulosity, dissent, and hunger for all that the Church can give. So it’s helpful to expect gay sojourners to be eager for Catholic discipleship. BCF has found that when mentors and leaders expect gay people to approach the Church in good faith, they inspire greater trust, deeper questions, and firmer commitment.

Gifted. Many Catholics assume gay people are objects of ministry in need of outreach, healing, and catechesis. In reality, everybody needs those things. Gay people, like others, are also active in their faith: serving, evangelizing, leading liturgical ministry, and sharing other gifts. So it’s helpful to expect gay people to bring gifts to the mission.  BCF has observed that when Catholics receive these gifts from gay people, old wounds can heal, ambivalence can become fervent faith, and gay discipleship becomes missionary.

Witnesses. Many Catholics assume devout Catholics are straight, and openly gay people can’t be good Catholics. In reality, more people than we realize are both devoutly Catholic and openly gay. They are often unsure how their full stories will be received in both gay and Catholic spaces. So it’s helpful to expect gay people to have witness the Church needs. BCF has seen how gay people’s testimonies evangelize other gay people, encourage people who question their place in the Church, and are essential to competent gay ministry.

Inspired. Many Catholics assume Scripture and Catholic teaching will be perceived as anti-gay. In reality, many gay people find that Scripture and doctrine illuminate their real experiences, and these experiences help them understand their faith. So it’s helpful to expect gay people to be inspired by Scripture and doctrine. BCF has found that the more confident mentors are in their knowledge of doctrine, the more easily they connect these eternal truths to individuals’ experience.

Called. Many Catholics assume the Church has vocational guidance only for straight people. Gay people see only a “vocation of no.” In reality, both now and historically, gay people have found ways to love and be loved in and through their lives as Catholics. So it’s helpful to expect gay people to hear a call to give and receive love. BCF knows that all Catholics benefit from a Church where multiple life paths are supported: marriage, priesthood, religious vows, intentional community, lasting friendship, and more.